Against the pleadings of my better angels, I’m ending the week on the war of words between Adam Lambert and Out editor Aaron Hicklin. The “American Idol” silver winner and Hicklin are having a minor public disagreement. For the moment I’ll leave alone how Lambert, in his brief career, is suffering from diva-itis or how for the editor manufactured outrage is a boon for sales. The whole thing leaves me tired because once again it shows how much we yearn for heroes when they are useless.

You all read the web and newspapers. You know the struggle for gay rights. From marriage to school safety,  the times we live in are serious. Yet we all go ga-ga when someone on the fame machine comes out as a member of the tribe.

Suddenly the newly minted fame queen gets courage awards, gala dinners, magazine covers, requests to expound on the political struggle. [You know the names. Ellen DeGeneres, T.R. Knight. Rosie O'Donnell, Wanda Sykes, etc. etc]. She is asked to be a spokesperson for a diverse tribe,  and we give [fame gay] the microphone and clap with tears streaming down our faces. Does she speak for us because she is an expert on the vagaries of political power?  Knows how to form coalitions? A great fundraiser? No.  Her only claim is talent, appearances on the big or small screens, and sexuality.

That’s not enough. More sizzle than substance. [But we do it anway, convinced this media light will lead us somewhere].

If Lambert wants to sing as if the only gays who exist are the ones he brings home to bed down, good for him. [That's his right and anyone who wants to take that away does not understand the meaning of "small d" democracy]. He’s not required to be a spokesperson and his opinion would not have protected the two youngsters we recently lost. What keeps them alive, and the 16 year old Houston boy from a vicious beat down,  are the nameless ones. The folks who never grace Entertainment Weekly or get to share coffee chat with Regis and Kelly. The anonymous who make it known through action and word gay citizens have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

If Lambert wants to steer away from anything gay, it’s all good. He and the other fame queens out there are not going to save us or make us feel better about our lives. Those “austere and lonely offices” belong to us [and only us. To steal from a recent candidate for the White Hosue,  we are the ones we've been waiting for].

UPDATE: After reading the comments, it’s obvious I wasn’t clear. I made some additons with the ever helpful [  ] . Sorry for the confusion.

1. I’m behind the curve on this one, but I’m not getting the whole Twilight thing. But that’s good, no?

2. Any opinions on the couple, Aiyi-nah Ford and Torian Brown, that were kicked out of a diner for too much PDA? No fan of PDA but have you ever heard of a straight couple being asked to leave for holding each other?

3. For those convinced Henry Gates was arrogant and  got what he deserved, what do you say about this video? Did the woman get her comeuppance? Will you defend the police? Or wonder what this story has to do with a gay news site? Nothing at all. Nothing at all.

4. I have a new boyfriend. He just doesn’t know it  yet. That’s something I need to work on. None of my former boyfriends knew we were going out.

5. Anyone who throws a sex toy at an Adam Lambert concert is an idiot.

6. If you are going to go on a show and spread disinformation about death panels, at least have the decency to have the page marked.

7. I want to visit Buenos Aires, the city of Jorge Luis Borges.

8. Happy 100th birthday Lester Young.

9. Guess who is blogging now? Beau, baby? Why do you never call?

10. An unassisted triple play!? The Mets season is now officially  over. 2010 baby!

I get where you’re coming from. But there are deeper lessons to be gleaned.

First, notice how Lambert comes out—in a music magazine, with his sexuality occupying a relatively minor portion of the article. And he does so with the candid yet indirect phrasing “I don’t think it should be a surprise for anyone to hear that I’m gay.” The gayness is almost taken for granted—embedded in a sentence about public reaction, rather than placed front and center.

That approach reflects a larger trend in how society—and in particular, younger generations—view gayness: as a simple matter-of-fact, not something to be belabored. The contrast with Clay Aiken’s “Yes, I’m Gay” People Magazine cover is subtle but important.

And yet, second, there’s an ambivalence in the article that captures the national tone on the issue. Lambert says, “It shouldn’t matter. Except it does. It’s really confusing.”

He’s right on all three counts.

“It shouldn’t matter.” American Idol is a singing competition, and Lambert wanted to—and should—be judged on his vocal performance. His decision to wait until after Idol to answer the gay question, he claims, stemmed from his desire that his sexuality not overshadow his singing. (It may also have stemmed from a desire for votes, and I couldn’t blame him for that. It’s not as if he lied about being gay or took great pains to hide it.)

“Except it does [matter].” As Lambert himself put it in the interview, “There’s the old industry idea that you should just make sexuality a non-issue, just say your private life’s your private life, and not talk about it. But that’s bullshit, because private lives don’t exist anymore for celebrities: they just don’t.”

The music industry doesn’t just sell songs; it sells images. For better or worse, personal backstory is part of that (especially on Idol).

What’s more, gay celebrities give hope to closeted gay kids, who need to know that they’re not alone and who sometimes don’t have gay role models in their everyday lives. That’s not to say that Adam Lambert is any more representative of gay life than any other gay person. It’s just to say that his representation, such as it is, will reach more people.

“It’s really confusing.” Yes indeed. We live in a nation where, for some people, much of the time, gayness is a non-issue, and for others, virtually constantly, it’s huge. American Idol is one of those “common denominator” phenomena (say that three times fast!) where these different groups interact with each other. Often they can do so while avoiding the issue of sexuality. But not always.

And the tension here is not just between groups; it’s also internal. When Lambert says, “I’m proud of my sexuality. I embrace it. It’s just another part of me,” he unwittingly raises a question—one that opponents often hurl at us: “Why be ‘proud’ of something that’s ‘just another part’ of you?” Why take pride in a trait that you didn’t choose and is supposed to be no big deal?

Answer: because it is a big deal. It does matter. Maybe in an ideal world it wouldn’t, but we are still far from that world.

Ironically, it’s a big deal precisely because our opponents insist on making it a big deal. Thanks to them, Adam Lambert (like every gay person) has to negotiate the issue of revealing his sexuality in a way that straight people never do. I think he’s handled it admirably.

Lambert told Rolling Stone that “I’m trying to be a singer, not a civil rights leader.” Fair enough. But it’s also fair to note that civil-rights change doesn’t only come from civil-rights leaders. It also comes from countless small acts of revelation by ordinary and not-so-ordinary people, including Adam Lambert.
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John Corvino, Ph.D. is an author, speaker, and philosophy professor at Wayne State University in Detroit. His column “The Gay Moralist” appears weekly on 365gay.com. Read more about him at www.johncorvino.com.

John will be a volunteer faculty member this summer for Campus Pride’s Leadership Camp for GLBT students. For more about Campus Pride’s work, or to make a donation on John’s behalf to support this year’s program, visit http://www.campuspride.org/.

For anyone who cares I’m no fan of American Idol, and will hold on to my ducats instead of buying Adam Lambert’s new album (I will purchase Joshua Redman’s “Compass” though). Even with Lambert’s friend of Dorothy status confirmed , you won’t see me at any of his concerts or getting weepy because he’s part of the sisterhood. Who he brings home at night matters not (unless he’s being a shameless tart  by talking to someone I’m into!).

However, I will give the Idol runner-up credit for this line in his Rolling Stone magazine interview:

“I’m trying to be a singer, not a civil rights leader.”

Hopefully all of Lambert’s fans will keep this in mind and not pester him for position papers on Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, marriage rights, or whatever gay and lesbian political issue is out there. As fans we expect too much from the famous who happen to be gay. We want them to be role models for “the community” (please no sexual scandals like George Michael!) and to sound intelligent when talking about gay rights. Essentially we hand over to them spokesperson status because they happen to be on the screen. Lambert gets points for not playing the game.

As he said his job is singing and nothing else. To expect anything else is to place a burden on Lambert a straight crooner never has to deal with. That isn’t what freedom is about.

The 27-year-old singer from San Diego acknowledges in an interview that he’s gay, and says it shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone. Says Lambert: “I’m proud of my sexuality. I embrace it. It’s just another part of me.”

Lambert says he was inspired to audition for the Fox network singing competition after having a “psychedelic experience” at the Burning Man festival in Nevada.

Lambert says he knew “American Idol” was his “only shot to be taken seriously in the recording industry, because it’s fast and broad.”

1. I was not the reporter Beau Breedlove tried to get a stalking order against. I’m too lazy and disorganized for the job.

2. No disrespect to my colleague Ruby, but Adam Lambert’s sexuality? Meh.

3. If you get booted out of a gay bar, you should not try to get back in the same establishment 20 minutes later.

4. Number 3 is not advice I need to follow. I’m a low maintenance drunk. Ask my bartenders.

5. Don’t care how passionate you are about abortion, if you defend the murder of a doctor in a church your loon status is set in stone.

6. If the news about Sade’s new album are untrue, I’m eating a gallon of butter pecan ice cream.

7. Steak night baby!

8. Prince Harry is the king of New York City.

9. Because I loathe everything LA (the city, not the state), I’m going for Orlando in the NBA Finals.

10. Need new shoes.

We all knew Adam Lambert was gay. I’m a lesbian and even I could tell. Photos surfaced months ago of Adam lip locked with girls, boys, boys dressed as girls and a few where I couldn’t tell the sex of the other party in the photo.

But I can’t help but be disappointed that Adam chose not to (or was not permitted to) disclose his sexuality while Idol was still in progress.

The fact that previous Idol contestants have come out of the closet has been important and contributed to the overall visibilityof the gay community on mainstream television. Can’t argue with that.

But having an Idol contestant come out during the show would be an excellent litmus test for the tolerance of the American public. If Lambert’s votes had stayed strong, it would have been a success. If Lambert’s votes had dropped, the dip could have been used to bolster tolerance campaigns and anti-homophobia initiatives, especially amongst the teen population.

You see, it was a win-win for the gay community to have Lambert proclaim his sexuality while his fate was still uncertain. Instead, Adam will be on the cover of Rolling Stone in an Ellen-esque gay pronouncement.

And so, the “most glamorous idol ever” (according to Regis) is only gay when we all know he won’t be the Idol afterall. It is still a huge success for the visibility campaign. But, it’s not quite the gay triumph it could have been.

I’ll say it anyway because, barely minutes after Kris Allen was announced as the “upset” winner of American Idol, my Facebook feed was loaded with status updates declaring Adam’s loss a “hate crime,” with people vowing to take the streets to protest (on the eve of the anniversary of the White Night riots, no less).

I trust that their histrionics were limited to message boards, and that the streets are safe from drama. There will soon enough be events worth marching about.

None of which is to diminish the importance of Lambert’s nearly winning America’s blockbuster musical talent competition as a more-or-less openly gay performer. Sure, it’s not DOMA, or DADT, or ENDA. But if greater issues always displaced lesser ones, there would be no justification for watching American Idol in the first place—or for art of any sort.

As for those who think that a contestant’s sexuality is nobody’s business, I’ll buy that the moment we apply the same standard to straight performers. Kris Allen’s wife, explicitly identified, was a regular presence. Third-placer Danny Gokey, as we heard repeatedly, was a widower. Family backstory is standard Idol fare. But Lambert, as Entertainment Weekly’s Mark Harris aptly put it, “was apparently made by the hand of God and left in a basket backstage at Wicked.”

Should Lambert have beat Allen? Lambert is the clearly more talented singer and performer, though Allen is not without his charms.

Lambert is also queer—in the broad sense of that term. Put aside the internet pictures of him in drag making out with other guys. Many Idol voters were unaware of such pictures, despite their being aired, for example, by Bill O’Reilly on Fox News. (O’Reilly did so under the guise of “Will America have a problem with this?” but it’s hard to believe he wasn’t trying precisely to provoke such a problem.)

Many Idol voters surely also missed Lambert’s skillful non-answers to media questions about his sexuality. ”I know who I am,” he told Entertainment Weekly when asked the gay question. “I’m an honest guy, and I’m just going to keep singing.”

But no viewer could miss Lambert’s flamboyant costumes, his outrageous high notes, or his eyeliner. Whatever his romantic interests, Adam Lambert reads queer. And that’s new territory for Idol. While Clay Aiken, the last gay near-winner, projected “wholesome,” Lambert screams “edgy.” (It’s a pitch-perfect scream, held impossibly long, which pierces the audience.)

And that’s why, despite Lambert’s superior vocal skills, Allen’s victory was unsurprising. American Idol contestants win by getting the most votes, and the average American doesn’t typically vote for queer. That’s part of what makes it queer, after all.

Nonetheless, Lambert seems no less a victor, and I hope he’s basking in his glory right now, eyeliner and all.

He made it to the final round while unabashedly being himself (in his appearance and performance, if not in direct response to interview questions). He has solidified his reputation as a consummate entertainer. He will no doubt go on to have a great career, far more successful than Allen’s, and probably even more successful than the career he would have had were he constrained by the packaging that comes with the “Idol” title.

Meanwhile, he has taught America something, if not about gays, then at least about “queers.” He has “mad skills”, yes—but he was also unfailingly polite, consistently expressing gratitude for the behind-the-scenes folks who developed his arrangements. He graciously expressed admiration for his competitors, including Allen. He was edgy, but not off-putting—all of which made it easier for people to see the main thing: his tremendous talent.

Besides injecting new life into Idol, Lambert also appears to have changed its culture. Idol has always struck me as a homophobic show, not just because of the noticeable absence of openly gay performers, but also because of the juvenile gay innuendo that regularly takes place between judge Simon Cowell and host Ryan Seacrest. That innuendo seems to have dramatically decreased this season—no doubt partly due to Lambert.

It will be interesting to see, now that Lambert must shift his attention from votes to sales, whether he chooses to talk more explicitly about his sexuality. I look forward to what he has to say. But I look forward even more to what he’s going to sing.

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John Corvino, Ph.D. is an author, speaker, and philosophy professor at Wayne State University in Detroit. His column “The Gay Moralist” appears weekly on 365gay.com. Read more about him at www.johncorvino.com.

John will be a volunteer faculty member this year for Campus Pride’s Leadership Camp for GLBT students. For more about Campus Pride’s work, or to make a donation on John’s behalf to support this year’s program, visit http://www.campuspride.org/.

I’ve been waiting to say this ever since the show started: “American Idol” is all trash and anyone who has placed in that bloody contest is a hack of the highest order.

I feel a whole lot better. For years I’ve had to endure endless conversations as people went on and on about some third tier singer and how he/she was rated by Paula Abdul, a ninth tier singer. Slight detour: am I the only one to find it ironic that Abdul, Miss MC Skat Kat, is a JUDGE for a singing contest?! That’s like putting me on the committee that decides the Pulitzer Prize.

I’ve had to sit around adults, grown adults, getting into arguments about which singer was better and if the announcements of some mean SOB from Britain were fair. These same people could never discuss with detail the freaking Iraq War, but they could go on about how clothes choice ruined a run to the final moment. And people, if you don’t trust me about that show’s evil nature, I submit this: “American Idol” introduced to the world the dank phenomenon called ClayManiacs.

Call me a snob, a bitter old fat queen who doesn’t understand pop culture, or a hater of vibrant talent. Say what you will, but that show has destroyed the American song book and the professional life of the singer. More people in this beautiful, lovely, fat, and contented country know Ruben Studdard but know nothing about Cassandra Wilson or Abbey Lincoln.

Unfortunately though, no one cares what I think so the show gets an audience and people foam over the results. I hear one of the finalists is Adam Lambert and his sexuality is up for question. Why his bed mate(s) is any one’s business confounds, but that is neither here nor there. I know for gay solidarity I’m supposed to be all about Lambert winning, but couldn’t care less. Win or lose, I’ll be utterly dismissive because he will have the whiff of that show all over him.

My rant is done. Now I’m plugging into my iPod and listening to someone who probably would not win an “American Idol” contest (Simon would despise her tone) but stands above anyone on stage tonight or any other Idol champ: Ella Fitzgerald. Go crazy with the Idols if you must. I got the First Lady of Song.

She was also glued to her computer, chatting with members of the pro-Lambert Facebook group she founded. And to her phone, too, where she voted for Lambert at least 100 times in two hours.

“My husband thinks I’m totally nuts,” says the 35-year-old Illinois mom, an office manager for a moving company.

Perhaps, but there are millions just like Murrell, fans whose passions have been inspired by the unabashedly campy, cheerfully over-the-top Lambert, with his back nail polish, his “guyliner” and that jet-black, asymmetrical mop of hair that has no place in the natural world.

But then, perhaps nothing about Lambert, who will face the late-blooming Arkansas crooner Kris Allen in next week’s finale, is truly of this world; all season long, the judges have praised the rocker in terms sometimes touching on the metaphysical.

“You are a rock GOD!” crowed Kara DioGuardi after his rendition of Led Zeppelin’s “Whole Lotta Love.” “Dawg, you’re one of the best we’ve ever had on this stage,” opined Randy Jackson after Lambert’s “Cryin’,” by Aerosmith. Simon Cowell had no comment for Lambert’s “Mad World,” by Tears for Fears – just a very rare standing ovation.

And leave it to Paula Abdul to come up with this one: “You dare to dance in the path of greatness,” she told Lambert after “Born to be Wild” – not even one of his better-received performances.

If the judges have seemed to gush over Lambert, it was more surprising to see a guest singer express her unsolicited preference – during her performance. Katy Perry, performing “Waking Up in Vegas” on Wednesday, started out in a glittery cape emblazoned with Lambert’s name.

Of course, there’s always a certain mania surrounding “American Idol” contestants. But this year feels a little different. “There definitely is a new level of hysteria this season,” says Caryn Ganz, deputy editor of Rolling Stone’s Web site, rollingstone.com, which gets hundreds of emotional fan posts every time it recaps an “Idol” show.

Partly this can be attributed to the high quality of the final four singers – besides Lambert and Allen, who now face a very competitive finale, with only a million out of 88 million votes separating them this week, there was the gravelly voiced Danny Gokey, voted off Wednesday, and the throaty teenager Allison Iraheta, whose duet with Lambert to “Slow Ride” was a season favorite.

But it’s also because Lambert has evoked so much passion from both fans and detractors. One thing on which almost everyone agrees: The dude, as Jackson would say, can sing. (The word “pitchy” does not apply.) But his critics are annoyed by the embellishments, particularly his high-frequency wails – glorious high notes to fans, but screams to others.

“Adam outclassed Danny and Kris? How? By out-shrieking them?” wrote the aptly named “awfuladam” on newsday.com’s blog this week. “Danny and Kris SANG their songs, Adam, well, I don’t know what the heck you call that but it wasn’t singing.”

For Lambert fans, the low point this season was the night two weeks ago when the rocker, long assumed to be out in front by a mile, was suddenly relegated to the bottom three vote-getters. On rollingstone.com, there was an outpouring of fury and hurt. “We got 500 posts after that night’s recap, 80 percent of them outraged,” says Ganz.

On her own blog, Idol Tracker, Ann Powers found herself shocked at the depth of her feelings.

“I was haunted by my own reaction to Lambert’s near-elimination. Why do I care so much that he makes it? It’s embarrassing,” she wrote. Then, touching on his potential outcast appeal, she remembered checking out a David Bowie album as a youngster and thinking, “This guy is really strange and proud of it, I could be proud of myself, too. I look at Adam Lambert, and hear him sing, and think he might give that gift to some kids out there.”

Lambert, 27, has spoken of his childhood in San Diego, and how he always loved dressing up, but wasn’t exactly into soccer. He performed in musical theater as a youngster, and more recently appeared in the Los Angeles cast of “Wicked.” He once appeared opposite Val Kilmer’s Moses in “The Ten Commandments: The Musical” – getting the show’s only good notices.

Lambert’s theater training clearly infuses his “Idol” performances, both in his supreme confidence and in his penchant for changing his look to fit the song. While Allen, a gentle, 23-year-old worship leader who favors singing with his acoustic guitar, prefers T-shirts and jeans – one can’t imagine he stretches his “Idol” wardrobe allowance – Lambert turned up in a silvery suit and 1960s pompadour on Motown night.

But most often, he’s in androgynous rocker mode – the earrings, the nail polish, the heavy eyeliner. He’s been compared to such artists as David Bowie, Steven Tyler and Pete Wentz.

Then there’s the widespread speculation – actually, a widespread assumption – that Lambert is gay, based on widely viewed photos on the Web that appear to show him kissing another man. Lambert himself has said nothing – other than to say he has nothing to hide. But plenty of people are talking nonetheless: The latest cover of Entertainment Weekly headlines Lambert as “The Most Exciting American Idol Contestant in Years,” with an asterisk to the line: “And Not Just Because He Might Be Gay.”

The media interest stems mostly from the question of whether a gay or bisexual singer could win “American Idol.” Clay Aiken, the season 2 runner-up, did not come out until years later. But with Lambert, whatever his sexuality, the question seems beside the point: People don’t seem to care. He has a varied fan base, and gets his share of the tween girl screams in the “Idol” theater, though not as many as Allen, a heartthrob for the younger set. Some even carry signs saying, “Marry me, Adam.”

“I think fans have never really cared about people’s persuasions in the world of entertainment,” says Joyce Valach, 60, of Naperville, Ill. “As long as they’re entertained, they’re entertained.” She herself was long torn between Lambert and the much different Gokey, an understated church music director from Milwaukee.

But Murrell, the founder of the Facebook group, says she gets offended when some fans write anti-Lambert posts, saying that he looks like a freak.

“I say to them, ‘You just don’t know what makes people unique and different,’” she says.

“But you know, ‘Idol’ just brings out the craziness in some people.”