Comments on: Corvino: A personal tragedy

By: Raymond H. Clark

Raymond H. Clark — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 00:35:51 +0000

Memory eternal!

May he rest in peace and rise in glory!

Bud Burgoon-Clark
San Diego CA USA

By: JANORM

JANORM — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 01:23:47 +0000

Sir:
I was a closet case for 48yrs. Partly because of a career(Army for 26 yrs) and the other was a responsibility I assumed caring for my disabled brother and mother(both deceased). I suffered for 48 yrs with terrible migraine headaches and never knew why. I came out of the closet last Jan ’08. The migraines ceased almost over night. I have only had two attacks since then. During those 48 yrs I knew of people who commited suicide and even some that forced law enforcers to do it for them. I have watched friends and relatives slowly die of HIV/AIDS. I often wondered why I was spared. The one thing that has kept me going was the spiritual befief in GOD! I rationalized that God must have some purpose for me to do, some destiny to fulfill. I never thought that I would ever find a partner, but God in his merciful guidance, allowed me to find the right man without any trouble. We have been together for a while, and looks like for a very long time to go. Life has not been easy, but everything I have exerienced, good, bad, or indifferent, all had very excellent lessons to be learned. I have to admit, that I am still learning new ones every day. Such is the life we live, learn, and follow. I have one quote that I have followed and tried to live by:

In all Things of the World,
Know Thyself first,
Then all Others shall come to Light!

Socrates

Thank you, Dr Corvino, for that very poignant and moving story. It really served to totally reinforce everything I believe in! NJMJr!

By: Dr. Peter

Dr. Peter — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 21:43:00 +0000

….and, now, Dr. Corvino makes me weep yet again! My bio—my story.

Respectfully

By: teachermahn

teachermahn — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 18:21:32 +0000

I am a 43 yr old man. at 39 I decided to go back to school and get my degree. There was one major problem, I was into the “party” scene. I had only been “partying” for about 5 years. How I kicked my addiction was to alienate ALL of my friends while I was in school and made new ones. It was very difficult and I really wanted to hang with my old friends, but I knew NO good would come of that. People who do drugs are not necessarily bad people, they just make bad choices. I went through a small depression and finally got myself on track. I earned a 4 yr degree in 2 yrs and I haven’t looked back. I couldn’t imagine having to live in the closet too. You did not fail Chad. He failed himself. People will only change when they want to, you can’t make them.

By: Robert Katz

Robert Katz — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 22:39:09 +0000

This is a chilling reminder that drug-use is still widespread in our community. There are certainly many people who can party occasionally without any apparent adverse effects; I don’t begrudge them the choice of doing so. In your friend Chad’s case however, what occurred was the descent into full-scale addiction.

Your story illustrates quite clearly the costs of being stuck in the closet. Living in fear of being “outed” and thus rejected can result all too often in a level of stress for which many have found no other remedy than self-medication as a means to escape the emotional discomfort and self-loathing.

After a certain point addiction takes on a life of its own and it can be very difficult to turn one’s life around. Your friend Chad unfortunately sounds like one of those so used to keeping his own counsel that he was either unwilling or too scared to admit he needed help until he reached a point where suicide seemed like the only way out. Sadly, I have known a fair number of people over the years who’ve taken exactly that route and for exactly that reason.

While recovery is possible, it is not easy; too many give up before they’ve truly given it a chance and the result is as you’ve described. I am sorry for your loss.

By: nurmihusa

nurmihusa — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 21:32:50 +0000

People who have never experienced depression do not know – can not know – what a burden it is to live with. Living NEXT to it is difficult enough, living IN it is orders of magnitude different. Do not think you failed him. You didn’t. That he survived as long as he did, despite the obvious pain, is a testament to your efforts and to his.

AND YET… If he were dying from, say, colon cancer, his insides rotting away millimeter by agonizing millimeter – would you consider it a victory to insist he live with that torture yet one more day? Or could you discover a measure of peace knowing that his suffering had finally come to an end?

There are things much worse than death. Much, much worse.