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Loading ...Besen: Beauty queen vs. bitchy queen
The Miss USA contest began as a beauty contest and ended up as a mud bath. The theatrics started when celebrity blogger Perez Hilton, who was a pageant judge, asked Miss California, Carrie Prejean, if she supported marriage equality.
“I think it’s great that Americans are able to choose one or the other…choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage …(but) I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman,” Prejean replied. She then added that she did not wish to offend anyone.As a result, she may have lost the beauty contest. Hilton inflamed the issue by calling her a “dumb bitch” on his video blog. The catfight quickly spiraled into a cultural sensation nearly on par with Janet Jackson’s Super Bowl “wardrobe malfunction.”
What could be juicer for the television talk shows than a jilted beauty queen vs. a bitchy queen spewing venom about the hottest of hot button issues? For two dueling airheads, this story has certainly had no shortage of oxygen.
At first blush, the preening Prejean seemed to give a dumb answer as Hilton suggested. He also rightfully pointed out that Miss USA is not supposed to be a divisive figure and is expected to represent all Americans – not just religious conservatives.
But I think that Prejean was more a victim of bad timing. The mindless, “marriage should be between a man and a woman, has become a standard reply to this question. She had probably heard it from politicians – including Democrats – for years and must have presumed that this answer was suitable.
This time, however, something had changed. Gay people were finally sick and tired of hearing that they should accept inferior status. When Prejean stated that she hoped not to offend anyone, the truth was she had. For the first time, it was no longer acceptable to repeat this mantra in polite company.
Anti-gay commentators were quick to point out the hypocrisy of gay activists. They wondered why Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama were allowed to say the exact same thing as Prejean while gay activists kissed their rings. The short answer is that Sam Brownback, Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee weren’t in the beauty contest. If they had been, Ms. Prejean may have seemed like a pleasant alternative.
But anti-gay activists do raise a good point. In future presidential elections, how can we hold Democrats to a lower standard than Miss California? Has the time come when the GLBT community will not support presidential candidates that fail to endorse full marriage equality?
This brouhaha also creates a conundrum for mainstream Americans who consider themselves pro-gay, but are unwilling to support marriage equality. The Miss USA debate effectively eliminates this comfort zone and pushes people to make a decision. It says: “you’ve had a decade to consider the issue – so make up your mind and get off the safety of the fence.”
After I appeared on the O’Reilly Factor on this issue, I received an avalanche of e-mail – many from people who did not consider themselves bigots, but nonetheless wanted to ban GLBT people from an institution they consider essential to their own lives. If marriage is indispensable for heterosexuals, how could they not think it so for homosexuals? There is a real disconnect where people want to believe they are tolerant – yet demand GLBT Americans stay in their place.
Unfortunately, Prejean dug a deeper hole by saying that it was more important for her to be “biblically correct” than politically correct. In doing so, she followed in the dubious footsteps of another beauty queen turned anti-gay activist – Anita Bryant.
After appearing on major talk shows, Prejean returned to California and immediately hit the church circuit. On the pulpit, she said that producers of the state pageant demanded that she apologize to the gay community and refrain from mentioning religion when she appeared on television.
But Roger Neal, a San Diego public relations representative who advised Prejean, said she was untruthful. “She chose to stand up in church and in front of the media and say something that was a lie,” Neal said. “No one ever said, ‘You must apologize to the gay community,’ and no one ever said, ‘Don’t talk about your faith or your religion.’ Those two things never came out of anybody’s mouth.”
As anyone in showbiz knows, getting typecast can be career suicide. As the new Bryant – Prejean will get her 15 minutes of fame and then be reduced, in a few years, to singing the national anthem at anti-gay rallies.
The real winner, of course, was Perez Hilton, who is now as much a household name as Paris Hilton. While he raised an important question, the broader implications of this skirmish have yet to be fully answered.
Hey OJ
Others have responded to your post already, so I won’t bother pointing out why you’re wrong. But I really couldn’t let this bit pass:
“Gays and lesbian have not suffered the big deal of Black people during the horrible 200 years of slavery, discrimination and abuse, or perhaps the persecution of Jews during World War I.”
Do a bit of reading, willya?
Miss California has the right to be as ignorant or as bigoted as she chooses. For me, a gay American, I see nothing beautiful about that. She deserved to lose, and she did. The fact that she won in California, home of Proposition 8, is echoes eerily of a root-cause problem in that state. Then again, it isn’t like California has problems like Oklahoma or Texas.
Let her say what she wants. All this attention is unwarranted and somehow… immodest.
I wish to respond to only one of Miss California’s comments. Her belief that a man and a woman is the only normal marriage. Well, I was taught either by the words or by actions that Black and Brown persons were lessor than my white family and friends. Today, that is not an acceptable attitude is our society. I was also taught that “queers” were bad people and should not be tolerated. Suprpise, I have known that I was queer from about the age of 5…it took me 40+ years to overcome that untruth. We have been taught many incorrect and inhuman ideals over the years, but that does not make them right.
How absurd. We already tolerate bigots in America. What we will NOT tolerate is bigots taking away a civil liberty. It happened with interracial marriage in this country and it’s happening again. Guess what, interracial marriage was eventually allowed. The same will happen for gay marriage no matter how much you piss and moan and pretend that we aren’t being tolerant because we are proponents of equal rights.
You must have fallen off of one heck of a turnip truck.
Oh, one more thing OJ, you don’t know how badly gays and lesbians who ARE BLACK.
“Homophobia is like racism and anti-Semitism and other forms of bigotry in that it seeks to dehumanize a large group of people, to deny their humanity, their dignity and personhood” -Coretta Scott King
@R&R (about your oj comments)
RIGHT ON honey!
SAY WHAT YOU WILL ABOUT PEREZ BUT I ALSO SAY “YOU GO GIRL”!!! LOL
oj, you sound much like Anita Bryant. You do not know our history. Most of “you” don’t. So you mouth off without doing any research. Like the fantasy book called the bible, your diatribe has more than one contradiction.
“Freedom.” “Tolerance.” – yes but with your stipulated conditions. It is neither freedom nor tolerance if each is tagged with conditions.
Marriage should be nothing other than a commitment to each other made by two souls. Gender should play no part in that committment. It should be all about love, not plumbing.
What are you scared of? What threatens you? If your marriage is a perfect joining of two souls who love each other and are commited to each other why are you so worried, concerned, hysterical over what others do? Is you life that empty? Is your marriage that empty or phony?
Your arguments are empty arguments. They are arguments made by someone who’s life is so narrow and so empty that there is nothing more to do than attempt to control others with whom you disagree. Too much cool aid, oj, put the glass down.
Frankly speaking to gays and lesbians, I don’t hate you people and whatever you want to do with your life is your problem, but hey, let others be who they want to be at the same time.
The solution to the gay-lesbian issue against heterosexuals in three simple steps:
1) Legal Union. First of all acknowledge that the word Marriage cannot be used in a gay union, since it was originally created to define the joint of a Man and a Woman. Those were the original values adopted by our first Fathers when America was founded. Do you want to have legal rights?, so be it, but call it “Gayrriage”, “Lesrriage” or “Union”. You can do whatever you want with your own beings then give the rest of the people the same right.
2) Freedom of speech. You have to accept others in their own believe, this is part of the self-tolerance and acceptance that we need in America. Don’t claim to be un-understood if you don’t accept other people’s opinions. When a gay or lesbian is asked publicly about their opinion they are allowed to talk, but right now that doesn’t happen the other way around. Carrie Prejean is a good example of that, she was asked about her opinion and she expressed it, but was unfairly criticized because of that. I think she did the right thing, she said what she thought, the same way a gay or a lesbian would do it, so why not letting her and other people talk. Gays are claiming rights by obliterating others the same right. Expect a fair treatment by giving example of fair treatment.
3) Accept other people. If you were to help someone during an emergency, would you ask for race, religion, origin, social status, or sexual tendency before helping? that’s stupid. Gays and lesbian have not suffered the big deal of Black people during the horrible 200 years of slavery, discrimination and abuse, or perhaps the persecution of Jews during World War I. Gays and Lesbian are accepted today in big corporations, in fact there are companies with policies that protect them, so why do you have to alienate others?. The same way you have the right to be accepted, you have the obligation to accept other people who believe in traditional marriage.
The only way we could survive together in America is by tolerance and acceptance. Extremism is a demonstration of lack of tolerance, that’s why we are fighting guerrillas all over the world because they don’t negotiate they just kill if you don’t agree with them.
Let’s enjoy this great nation of ours where we have the right of being who we want to be and live freely.
Here is a quote from Brian Brown, director of the National Organization for Marriage:
“‘Our mission is to protect marriage and the faith communities that sustain it,’ the group’s executive director Brian Brown said Tuesday. ‘We want to highlight the very real effects on our liberties and especially on religious organizations, businesses, and individuals.’
Brown also said Tuesday that the group is concerned that people of faith who oppose same-sex marriage are being cast as bigots in much the same that people who opposed racial integration were during the civil rights movements of the 1950’s and 1960’s.”
He is right to be concerned, since that is exactly how his group and those who support it are acting – as bigots.
NO they gay “community” will not hold the democratic party to the same standard as prejean. Election after election they will be gioving a pass byb the our supposed leaders and media. Anyone who goes against that borg thinking will be branded self-hating, jew for hitler type.
As to Wayne’s question on whether Gay voters will hold future Democratic nominees to a lower standard, and refuse to vote for them…..
I’ve said for a long, long time that the gay voting bloc, which is larger than the Christian coalition membership numbers, should prove to both parties that we have large enough numbers to sway an election, and that neither party can take our support for granted.
Then George Bush happened. If another one of his kind gets into office b/c we voted for a 3rd party I’d feel mighty guilty about it.
On the other hand, we need to send a message.
We could all push to have all gay voters write in Dennis Kucinich’s name as he is the most supportive of our community.
The way I see it is this: what is someone had asked her about her thoughts about immigration, and she, the blonde beauty queen, had replied that this was a country founded by white people and white values and so she didn’t believe that non-whites should come here.
Would that be perceived as just a “principled” stand, or would it be seen as bigotry?
The thing is that a lot of ugly aspects of our culture that are now considered shameful, such as racism and slavery were once supported by religious values.
Many people argued, with a straight face, that whites were better than non-whites because the Lord had revealed Himself to them and not to the “coloreds” and so those “coloreds” should be grateful to, and subservient to, whites for bringing them the Good News and “allowing” them to worship their white God.
The Southern Baptists formed their denomination because mainstream Protestants mostly centered in the northern states were opposing slavery and they needed a pro-slavery Christian church. So in 1845 they founded one.
It wasn’t until 150 years later that they actually got around to formally repenting for their denomination’s history, which included decades of entrenched racism even after the Civil War.
As the saying goes, gay is the new black. Prejean will be venerated as a heroine of “traditional values” on the Right for a long time to come. Maybe she’ll even parlay it into a political career. The GOP loves beauty queens these days.
Aren’t we glad that Prejean spoke the conservative mind at this time which was emphasized by Hilton giving her shit. The controversy stood out in context with and added to what’s happening in marriage equality around the country. That Prejean didn’t get away with an Anita Bryant is a huge step. It required not playing nice right back.
Demanding the ‘more-on-our-side-than-not’ politicians to stand up for marriage and other equality should depend on whether we can get them in office with that requirement. Some of us believe Obama really doesn’t care whether marriage or domestic/civil partnerships but believed his being elected depended on his answer. And that his attempt at moderating cultural extremes depends on how he is perceived by those extremes. Do we want him for a second term? Sometimes you have to compromise and keep moving toward goals to be won. Tolerance is a two way street.
Timing shouldn’t matter when demanding rights in an ideal world but in a polarized one it can be stupid to ignore. Especially when you’re in the minority. Ask Iraqi, Ugandan, Jamaican gays. It could be argued that Newsom’s marriage proclamation in California helped the conservatives create a platform to win a presidency. Being demanding is important but working within a repressive climate requires care in making the next move. That’s not a prescription for inaction or waiting.
Some politicians that said they’d vote no in New Hampshire voted yes when they perceived public and peer pressure and our success in other states-social climate. It’s exciting to be alive to experience this cultural enlightenment by the recognition of a our minority’s civil rights!
Who cares about either of these 2?
Perez is just mean and catty sometimes. Yes, Prejean is in fact a dumb bitch, and lord knows that and I would never in my life argue that. But why are we still giving this Bible-humper her continued 15 minutes of fame???
Get on with life.
Gay marriage is flying into the mainstream by being legalized by States in New England and Iowa…and will continue to do so in other states across the country…
Let this “dumb bitch’s” 15 minutes fade already and discuss something more relevant…like say…I don’t know…what’s going on with HIV/AIDS in GLBT youth. Whats the infection rate now? What kind of HIV/AIDS education/prevention do kids receive in schools? Are students learning about the history of HIV/AIDS and how it sent the world into panic? Are they learning how it altered an entire comunities lives?
That little white lie about her sister being a gay-activist is another example of her being ”
biblically correct”
And the religious right will parade her around the churches regardless of the truth. Anything to support their “agenda”.