Comments on: Corvino: Beyond Tolerance

By: Trace

Trace — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 23:25:39 +0000

I do not want, expect or even really care about Tolerance. What someone else thinks really makes no difference to me.

What I expect and what I demand is the same treatment as others. I don’t believe in special right (and yes, it’s special rights that heterosexuals receive – while gay men and women are denied the same rights)for any group.

I don’t care about work place protections, but don’t think that any other groups (religious, sex, age, etc) should receive the same protections. I don’t think someone should be dismissed from the Army for being gay unless people are dismissed for be heterosexual. And marriage, nothing is appropriate but full marriage rights.

By: Quasi

Quasi — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 23:06:34 +0000

The older I get, the less I feel a need for acceptance or tolerance. I am more and more becoming like Sophia on the Golden Girls, and I speak my mind no matter the consequences. Those who have not lived long, and those who are bigots need to be told “how it really is!” I let people run over me too much in the past. No more, no how!

And when I travel or eat out and hear a group of people at another table “speaking with bigoted voice”, I too become just as loud and speak the truth so they hear it. They must learn they are not living in a vacuum or where the “majority can be tyrannical” any longer. Pi$$ on their hatred, intolerance and evil tolerance.

By: Rick

Rick — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 01:06:49 +0000

Well said, Nikko. I have never wanted to be tolerated since tolerance is usually associated with an unpleasant situation for the tolerating individual. Acceptance is something that every human being, as social animals, wants and often never achieves. I would be pleased if we could simply be respected.

By: Mario

Mario — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 00:04:51 +0000

“we want to be embraced and encouraged—like everyone else in society”
I think this was meant to be interpreted as “like everyone else in society, we want to be embraced and encouraged”. It’s a *desire* that everyone has. Or at least, it meant as opposed to straight people generally. Obviously, it wasn’t to mean that literally everyone else is embraced and encouraged – after all, no one would immediately conclude that he meant that felons are embraced and encouraged while gay people are not. But for some reason, you assumed that’s what he meant regarding race, class and disability, etc.
Of course, it’s little surprise as there will always be someone claiming to be horribly offended based on twisting the meaning of these sorts of columns, no matter what the column says.

By: JJ

JJ — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 06:15:44 +0000

I think that I have become more radical in my old age. I would have been happy with being tolerated or accepted not that long ago.

Now however, I find that being tolerated or accpeted is insulting. I am not a lower form of life. I am a human being entitled to the same rights as those who would patronise me. Unfortunately, I am a minority and therefore HAVE to suffer this sort of patronising.

By: nikko

nikko — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 06:42:51 +0000

Tolerance is a mild form of hatred.

By: Kirby Pope

Kirby Pope — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 23:22:32 +0000

John, I can only support the comments by Ed Fink. You said it so well, as usual.
“Thank you! I appreciate your teaching me how to frame what I believe but sometimes don’t know how to express.”

Tolerance is great, but it’s not enough.

Kirby

By: Greg Noone

Greg Noone — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 16:19:14 +0000

And I would like to add one more comment to these very thoughtful musings: fuck tolerance!
I could care less if str8s don’t like us, it is now the 21st century and it is high time that we demand full equality, not tolerance, not acceptance.
Religious blabber has poisoned debate and replaced critical thinking with blind obedience to a mis-translated old book!
Our nation (the USA) is great and wonderful because we have the freedom to say these things – we cannot allow the GOP and their twisted allies to begin a new Dark Age for this country.
Register to vote; get involved; volunteer for charity; and never, ever donate money to those who despise us.
Enough whining folks, we deserve better.

By: Janik

Janik — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 14:06:46 +0000

Hi John, I usually love your pieces. Here, unfortunately, I feel you’re building our defense on a fragile standpoint. It sets marriage as the measuring yard of relationship worthiness, when in fact heterosexuals enjoy full acceptance by the mere fact of being heterosexual. I consider of the outmost importance, when fighting prejudice, to point out the privileges a dominant population has and to which it usually is blind too, because it is a driving force behind double standards. It is easy for heterosexuals to say «you don’t need approval» when EVERYTHING around them approves of whom they are. This element is constitutive of their self worth, but they DON’T SEE IT. We’re not talking about whether we should feel frustrated over people not tolerating our tastes in rap music or in cheeseburgers, we’re talking about a cornerstone of our individualities: love and sexuality. The mere fact that your friend equates same-sex love to a taste in rap music speeks volumes about his interiorized perception of homosexuality. He might be(somewhat)gay-supportive, but he hasn’t come to destination yet.

By: qjersey

qjersey — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 10:43:04 +0000

“we want to be embraced and encouraged—like everyone else in society”

where do you live?

Are blacks, latins, asians, native americans, people with disabilities, immigrants, ‘unattractive people,’ those who aren’t rich embraced?

NO they are not. Although the American ideal is they we all would be, and the USA are FAR from that place.

Yet another white man (and yes I am white too), who just can’t accept the loss of his white privilege because of his gayness. Ironic given that the writer lives in Detroit.