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Loading ...Nationwide protests put human face on gay marriage battle
02.13.2009 9:40am EST
(San Francisco, California) Same-sex couples seeking to wed showed up at marriage license counters nationwide Thursday to highlight a right they don’t have in 48 states, part of an annual protest that took on renewed urgency given recent election setbacks.
In San Francisco, where same-sex marriage was legal for nearly five months last year before California voters approved a ban, many couples who came to City Hall had already tied the knot but wanted to express their gratitude and to show they’re still part of the fight.“All of our marriages are under the cloud of Proposition 8,” said Stuart Gaffney, 45, referring to California’s ballot initiative banning gay marriage. “Equality is an unfinished business in California.”
In Las Vegas, couples gathered outside the downtown marriage bureau with signs that read “Don’t hate my love” and “No laws on love.” In New York, activists wore signs that said “Just Not Married.” They were turned away empty-handed in both places when they asked for marriage licenses.
“We could get married in Massachusetts or Connecticut, but we’ll wait a little and see what happens in New York,” Matt Flanders, 37, of Brooklyn, said after he and his partner, Will Jennings, 29, participated in the protest in Manhattan. “It’s a matter of principle. This is our home, and we should be able to get married where we live, where our friends are.”
The protests around Valentine’s Day, part of the 12th annual Freedom to Marry Day, were considered especially important this year because they come after the November passage of Proposition 8. The measure has prompted protests, lawsuits and questions about the direction of the gay rights movement.
“A lot of people feel a sense of determination and regret over having been too complacent or quiet before, so there is a commitment to, `Never again, we have to take action,’” said Evan Wolfson, a civil rights lawyer who conceived Freedom to Marry Day. “In that sense, California was a terrific energizer and wake-up call.”
Currently, gay marriage is legal only in Massachusetts and Connecticut, while 30 states have gay marriage bans in their constitutions. Gay rights activists are pressing lawmakers in New Jersey, New York and Vermont to take up bills that would legalize same-sex marriage in those states.
Jennifer Pizer, director of the marriage project at gay rights legal group Lambda Legal, said the disappointing outcome of the California election has created momentum in other parts of the country.
Hawaii’s House of Representatives, for example, voted 33-17 Thursday to allow same-sex civil unions. The legislation now goes before the state’s Senate Judiciary Committee, where the vote is split among six senators, with one undecided. A tie vote would kill the civil union measure for the year.
In Utah, where a constitutional amendment approved by voters in 2004 prohibits same-sex unions, five gay and lesbian couples applied for marriage licenses in Salt Lake City on Thursday. County Clerk Sherrie Swensen said she could recall only one other gay couple asking to get married over the last 18 years.
In Maine and Minnesota on Thursday, dozens of proponents of gay marriage gathered outside the statehouses to lobby for bills that would legalize same-sex marriage in those states. Under a black and white banner that read “Legalize Love,” Minnesota lawmakers vowed to push the bill as far as they can.
State Sen. Scott Dibble, a Minneapolis Democrat who is one of the few openly gay members of the Legislature, said the country’s economic woes showed the need for couples to support each other. But gay couples can’t get many of the benefits of marriage that might make things easier, he said.
“Those with strong families more than anyone are going to be able to rely on each other,” Dibble said. “So why does our own government try to stop that from happening? Why does our own government try to stop us from trying to take care of each other?”
Troy Smith, 41, and his partner of six years, Justin Gibson, 26, were among the 15 couples waiting with tourists outside the marriage bureau in downtown Las Vegas. Smith, a coordinator at a local wedding chapel, said he’s constantly faced with the reality of Nevada’s constitutional ban on gay marriage.
“I sell it every day, but I can’t buy it myself,” he said, adding that he often sees couples rushing to the altar after knowing each other for hours. “It just about breaks my heart. It’s not fair.”
The California Supreme Court is scheduled to hear oral arguments next month on whether to uphold Proposition 8 and on the validity of the estimated 18,000 same-sex marriages sanctioned in the state between June and November. The court could render a decision as early as June.
I really can’t wait to see what unfolds in that Prop. 8 hearing. That could set precedence for the rest of the country.
In John Corvino’s blog, he made an important point: legal marriage for same-sex couples does not create anything that does not already exist. Legal marriage simply recognizes and confers benefits upon a relationship that already exists. This is true whether it is a hetero or homo couple.
The denial of the existence of our relationships cannot cause the relationships to cease to exist. If I and my partner (whom I’ve yet to meet) wish to declare ourselves husbands and live in a de facto common law marriage, we’ve had basically the same effect on society as if we had gone through a legal ritual. The only things we would be missing are the legal benefits and responsibilities that others have.
And yet, with thousands of these de facto same-sex marriages already out there, society carries on. What harm can legal recognition do to “traditional” families that Chris Brown and Nadya Suleman have not already wreaked?
Some things to put on a ballot next year:
* Elderly people who cannot bear children should not be permitted to get married.
* Barren females should be banned from getting married.
* Traditional marriage has no place for the mixing of the races as the Bible shows and history shows. So lets get that into the constitution too.
* Lets have a time limit on marriages without children. 6 months? a year? if you don’t reproduce your marriage is void!
-If this is an institution which is protected only because of its effect on children. Then lets make sure no one takes advantage that cannot and/or will not live up to this task.
Fortunately people marry these days not only because of children (although some do), or an arrangement (still in many cultures), or for money and to be “taken care of” (kinda the traditional role), but now they get married for love. Women have mobilized and work outside of the home. they can take care of themselves. They don’t NEED men for anything other than ’sperm’. It’s love that brings us together and keeps us together. Men and Women DO love members of the same sex. If we as a society find it worthwhile to reward two people who have promised to take care of eachother. Then gays should get married too!
MORGAN-THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT–IT ALL BOILS DOWN TO RELIGION AND ITS STRANGLE HOLD ON OUR STATE. ADAMS HAS TO GO- AND NONE TO SOON -THERE IS A SAYING HERE THAT SUSSEX COUNTY-(OUR COUNTY) IS THE MOST NORTHERN COUNTY IN MISSISSIPPI- ITS AMAZING HOW MANY GAYS LIVE HERE -3 LARGE GAY TOWNS HERE BUT NOBODY WANTS TO GET INVOLVED-BUT NICK AND I AND A HANDFULL ARE OUT TO CHANGE THINGS -HOPEFULLY THE GAYS HERE WILL WAKE UP -HOPEFULLY !!
RICK N’ NICK, I have a home in DE also as well as in MD. I am an MD resident but no partner yet, so I am pleased that you guys tried to challenge an archaic law. It means much to me as a hopefully future partnered man as well as to actually partnered men like yourselves. I have driven around that traffic circle in Georgetown, DE by that same courthouse. So I know the area.
Best of luck. There could be one day a Delaware civil unions bill, while MD gay residents are pushing for MD marriage equality. But that depends in part on the departure of some of the homophobes like Thurman Adams one of the very worst from the DE state legislature. DE and MD are different. MD gays are gaining rights while DE gays in say liberal and very urban Rehoboth is surrounded some miles out by largely conservative rural areas.. Things in DE are slower and one DE gay guy I know of who stays on top of the legislative scene in DE says word has it that Adams who has a speaker position in the statehouse and at 79 likely retiring after his current term expires. And word has it that there could be a DE civil unions bill before. My contact also says that DE legislators have a tough “noone will tell us what to do in DE”.
They are very indifferent to the world outside of DE. indifferent to NJ civil unions and to the likelihood of NJ marriage equality on DE’s northern border and to the possibility of marriage equality or to that of civil unions in MD on DE’s western and southern borders.
MY PARTNER AND I WENT TO THE COURTHOUSE IN GEORGETOWN DELAWARE AND ASKED FOR A LICENSE-WE WERE TOLD THEY COULD NOT MARRY US BECAUSE OF A LAW THAT HAS BEEN ON THE BOOKS FOR EVER AND EVER !!?? THEY WERE VERY NICE TO US BUT DID NOT HAVE A CLUE AS TO WHAT THE LAW WAS ABOUT HERE.THE RECEPTIONIST WAS VERY KIND TO US AND WE LEFT WITHOUT CONFRONTATION. WE THEN LEFT TO PROTEST IN OUR STATE CAPITAL OF DOVER, DE. WE GOT 60 SIGNATURES IN OUR FAVOR-NOT BAD !!
Some of the male protesters in New York City were wearing wedding vales. Unfortunately the image of guys in lace is not going to gain support for equal marriage among the public that we need to win over to our side.
I’d be there if it weren’t for my couny juror duty obligation in Maryland on the east coast the next morning of the 18th.
In California we are also protesting on Monday, LOVE AND MARRIAGE DAY and Tuesday LOBBY DAY in Sacramento.
Course I think it’ll be raining…but that won’t dampen spirits!