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Loading ...Councilwoman retracts letter of support for San Diego gay pride
07.15.2009 1:05pm EDT
(La Mesa, Cali.) Ruth Sterling, a Councilwoman in La Mesa, California, retracted a letter of support she sent to the San Diego gay pride celebration after receiving pressure from conservative Christian activist James Hartline to do so.
Sterling, a Republican, was one of about 20 elected officials who had sent letters of support to the nonprofit San Diego LGBT Pride organization. After her letter was posted to the group’s website, Hartline told her he thought she should have it removed. Sterling said she initially refused.Last month, Sterling sent a second letter to the group after she discovered more about “the nature of some of the activities that take place” and that she “was shocked and shaken to my core to learn of the lewd and lascivious behavior and unconscionable activities portrayed.”
“Her letter was just disappointing,” said Ron deHarte, executive director of San Diego LGBT Pride. “The words she was using were disappointing coming from an elected official in the year 2009.”
Read the full San Diego Union-Tribune story here.
Why should we be ashamed about Pride parades? Do they get lewd? Yes. Will someone always find them inappropriate? Yes. Should we care? No. One thing I have started to fear as a young gay man is the loss of a GLBT identity. If we’re going to be stereotyped let’s make the stereotypes, let’s show we have nothing to be ashamed about, we don’t lie about what we do in the bedroom, and we should accept the repurcussions and just keep going. If all they see is the sex then that is their problem. Screw “normality”!
Mark – I guess that means they’ll have to be judging their life by your personal standards? LOL!
Yes, the actions of the few can unfairly affect the whole to some extent – that’s the nature of group dynamics. Politics, like art, at times needs to be provocative – to push buttons, to force people to question and challenge things. There isn’t one universal standard here and there probably isn’t ever going to be and in a way – that’s good. Boundaries will be pushed, people will be provoked, repulsed, curious etc. Some will see what the want to see, some will be inspired. Seems to me the second we start implying that there is just “one standard” we are heading in a precarious direction.
Mark,
“I so beg to differ that this is ‘internalized homophobia’ and I so challenge anyone to disagree after they have examined their own life.”
That is a funny line. So if I examine my life can I disgaree with ya?
Sincerely,
James
I totally support Jeff’s comments. The inappropriate behavior at Pride events generates a negative public perception which affects all GLBT people’s civil and marriage rights. So it is not a matter of just not attending, it is a matter of not approving or endorsing the activities of the disgusting lewd few who use their sexuality to shock and offend, as opposed to love and care for one another. I personally do not care for disgusting behavior that only sets us back further with advancing our civil rights.
I have fought for gay civil rights for 21 years, and the only ‘internalized homophobia’ are those people who do not respect themselves and their own bodies and instead choose to subscribe to all of the subcultural baggage, crap and cliches about their interpretation about what it means to be gay. Being gay to me is not about embracing sexual lewdness and harrassment, poppers, bars, porn, bathhouses, public nudity, promiscouity, smoking, drug use, or alcohol abuse. IT IS NOT INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA TO CONDEMN UNHEALTHY BEHAVIORS!!!
I do not equate accepting unhealthy behaviors with just part of the coming out process, and it is a shame that so many in the GLBT community cannot understand that freedom and “rights” also come with responsiblities too.
If anyone needs to deal with their internalized homophobia, it is those who follow the narrow social script written by those who do not respect themselves, their own bodies, or the dignity of others and draft this all up as “how to be gay”. Balony.
On the contrary – you people need to come out of your gay ghetto closet and stop destroying yourselves with your deceptive open relationships and public sexuality. I applaud Sterling and I think we as gay people need to be able to examine our own behavior and how it affects others, without only defending unhealthy behavior as a sad commentary of “what it means to be gay”. Try getting an education, having a professional career, a nice home and being loyal to a partner in a long term committed relationship. This is my version of being gay – and I earned every bit of it while 100% out of the closet – what’s your version of being gay?
I am ashamed of many aspects of Pride because of the unhealthy behaviors that degrade gay sexuality into a public sex act and people into walking stereotypes.
I embrace those who serve as positive role models as gay professionals who contribute as productive members of society. I so beg to differ that this is ‘internalized homophobia’ and I so challenge anyone to disagree after they have examined their own life.
I would just turn a blind eye to the nuttier and more uncouth displays and simply look away from them and then walk to the more sensible ones depending on point of view. Not every one feels the same about all this stuff. That is not internalized homophobia, that is having a certain set of standards you live by.
Thank you, BryanKCMO. It’s really just internalized homophobia that makes people in our community dislike or ashamed of Pride.
Then don’t go. It’s that simple. You sound like the rightwing conservatives who trash gay marriage. If you’re against gay marriage then don’t get one. If you dont like the Pride events then dont go!
i have a feeling once the gay message becomes loud and clear what she did is wrong that she will then apologize.
why is it that politicians and others bow to the christian right only to then bow to the lgbt community. i think it is their way of playing the fence!
take a stand one way or the other!
Jeff Said:
“To be quite honest, I as a gay man avoid and am literally ashamed by the activities that go on during the so-called “Pride” parades.
It upsets me to my core to be identified in any way with the some of the flagrant displays of sexuality rampant during “Pride” events. I certainly respect everyone’s right of public expression, even if I find it personally unappealing, lewd, and very inappropriate in public and personally wish to have to part of it or support it.
Politically, these “pride” events actually are damaging the larger causes of the gay civil rights movement. Showcasing lewd, over the top displays during pride events helps to solidify negative attitude of gay people in the general population, even though most gay people are more like their more subdued straight neighbors.
If I were an elected representative, I would not support such events. Rather I would issue declarations and ensure that gay people are treated equally under law.”
Kudos.
Hear- Hear.
The gay community is quite diverse and some of the displays in the parades may not reflect everyone’s taste, but they are historically part of gay life. In a way they represent a critique of suburbanista, Beigeville hypocrisy. Yes, we want to marry and would like to participate in the mainstream, but perhaps not at the cost of overlooking every aspect of gay history, either.
To be quite honest, I as a gay man avoid and am literally ashamed by the activities that go on during the so-called “Pride” parades.
It upsets me to my core to be identified in any way with the some of the flagrant displays of sexuality rampant during “Pride” events. I certainly respect everyone’s right of public expression, even if I find it personally unappealing, lewd, and very inappropriate in public and personally wish to have to part of it or support it.
Politically, these “pride” events actually are damaging the larger causes of the gay civil rights movement. Showcasing lewd, over the top displays during pride events helps to solidify negative attitude of gay people in the general population, even though most gay people are more like their more subdued straight neighbors.
If I were an elected representative, I would not support such events. Rather I would issue declarations and ensure that gay people are treated equally under law.
Sterling is clueless if she believes anything at all James Hartline has to say about Pride. He’s San Diego’s very own Fred Phelps.
Send a message to Councilwoman Ruth Sterling at: ruth@ruthsterling2008.com or contact her in her La Mesa office at (619) 667-1106. or email to : rsterling@ci.la-mesa.ca.us
I’ve sent Councilwoman Sterling this email message:
Councilwoman Sterling:
I just read in The Advocate and in the San Diego Union-Tribune about your letter withdrawing earlier support for the Pride Celebration, and I must express my extreme disappointment with your timidity and moral failure in caving in to a religious-oriented pressure group. Gay people express themselves in many ways in the Pride parades and they are every bit as much your constituents and fellow citizens as are the fundamentalist and evangelical Christians who have unfortunately influenced you to abandon your fellow gay citizens. Gay people pay taxes, operate businesses, serve the public and participate in the polity no less than do religious conservatives. Your contempt for gay people as expressed in your letter is a reflection not upon them but upon your own shortsightedness and cowardice as a public official in your willingness to serve only those who apparently control you. Develop a backbone and represent ALL the people you are charged to serve.
Interesting, we’ve just been discussing this over in the “Cast of Hair..” thread. I believe her conditional support would have been the more pragmatic approach and I’ve written her directly to express as much.