Comments on: Besen: A click away from love

By: Wayne Besen

Wayne Besen — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 12:59:42 +0000

I don’t really get that the co-owner of Man Hunt is backing McCain. One has to be somewhat delusional to own a site that has men with traffic cones up their behinds – and still call himself a conservative. (a slight exaggeration, but I’m trying to make a point)

I suggest the co-owner backing McCain go to the Republican convention in Minneapolis – wear a ManHunt T-Shirt – and see what kind of reception he gets.

Well, with those closet cases, he might just make an extra million dollars.

By: Mike

Mike — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 12:37:06 +0000

Two things here:
With these days, more and more ways of meeting other gay men for husband hunting are as varied as one’s immagination exist than just bars and internet, such as social events, various clubs centered around say gardening, outings, biking, hiking, films, churches, cars, mens’ retreats and much more, Manhunt etc are not the only game available for finding a potential mate, so I will not believe the only way for the modern gay man to find a suitable potential mate is via a “million mouse clicks” unless one is both gay and rural. Joining a common hobby, interest or passtime group with other gay men is good way to see in person if a particular man catches one’s eye if one like seeing how he comports himself in public with other men and with other people in general before introducing one’s self.

and next:
“Let’s not try to emulate Ozzie and Harriet, gentlemen”.
Might work for Dave and other like-minded men, but won’t work for other men like myself especially if the responsibility -laden but joyfilled task of raising kids is involved. While I’d encourage my future husband to enjoy his work, his space, his time, his own hobbies, some time with his friends and birth family, but especially when raising his own kids and mine, as his husband, I would like him to at least let me know if he plans to spend a certain evening or afternoon with his family or friends (which of course is OK)so that I can make plans to do something with the kids while he is not there and just let the kids know that their other Dad is OK, he is with family and friends and he’ll be home in a few hours.

I don’t intend to follow my husband around and to keep track of all he does, I need to be able to assume and to trust that he is a caring, responsible, intelligent and mature man with his family’s and husband’s best interest at heart and that he will be home for dinner unless he tells me that he has an invitation from family and friends for that evening out, but unless there is an emergency, for my family’s sake and mine, he will be home in time to hug and kiss his very own family goodnight and will be spending his nights in bed with me his husband.

If this all proves to be not what he wants, and he wants his freedom to go from man to man as in a sexual sense and we have kids, and his heart is no longer with us then I will have to call a family meeting and maybe a family couselor and just sit back and let the kids ask him questions as to what his future with us is and just what his intentions are and whether he feels he was meant for the family way of life, if he not, we may have to wish him well and even if it hurts us badly, just continue without him as one parent-family.

Treating other men as mere play-toys for our amusement, just to throw them away as if they were empty candy wrappers and leave them wondering if that is the best gay life and gay men have to offer is not the kind of values I want to teach my kids and is not idea I want them to have that most gay men are not capable of doing better.

By: Doug loves you

Doug loves you — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 04:34:08 +0000

Ijust read the news of Manhunt owners support of McCain. That is just what we all need. Did you happen to read the Sunday newspapers where our brillant President wants to toss out endangered species as a way to ease our need for oil and anything else we can use to destroy Earth? By clicking on Manhunt you are giving money to try to elect 4 more years of Republican raping of our world at the death of innocent animals. I dont know that we humans have done anything to deserve what we have, at least in America. What do you think?

By: Tristan Robin

Tristan Robin — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 20:39:30 +0000

I found my husband online a decade ago. Thank heavens I don’t have to do *that* routine any more! I found it time-consuming, disappointing, sometimes demeaning – and, worst of all, boring.

By: Will

Will — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 16:41:21 +0000

Awesome article! Although, personally I am boybotting manhunt because the founder is funding John McCain: http://www.365gay.com/blog/081408-manhunt-founders-donate-cash-to-mccain/ I’m totally cool with gays that have conservative politics… except when they support people pushing anti-gay agendas.

By: Dave

Dave — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 13:51:20 +0000

I’m in a long-term open relationship (17 years). I go online for friendly, no-strings hookups. It may be total objectification, but at least I’m honest about it. I have a non-cyber social existence too.

I also think there are plenty of guys out there who are not looking for a husband, who enjoy being single, and want an occasional hookup. Again, if you’re honest about it, why is it a problem?

Let’s stop trying to emulate Ozzy & Harriet, gentlemen.

By: Doug loves you

Doug loves you — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 10:22:26 +0000

It seems so many of you guys out there are extremely lonely and need an actual body to talk to and be with. Maybe you do need to get out and meet other men. It is fun to make new friends and hopefully find Mr. Right. But you do need social skills{i hate that phrase}to be an interesting guy and not just a nice piece of meat. Me, i have a man that i met the old way,at work. Been together 31 years now. I wouldn’t trade him in for all the beautiful young,hung idiots at the bars. We laugh and have a good time together. Good luck and hope you find a loving companion too. Gotta go,he’s fixing breakfast.

By: Will

Will — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 08:25:52 +0000

Wow..Now I don’t do manhunt.

A mall here (N. Y.) used to have a gay club.Gone since 93. Can’t say it is a decline because of internet.But I do see the muteing of gays.In many ways. Even to develop S.A.D. isolated lives to fear, abuse & due to Internet & to the said sites.It does kill people off. In multiple ways.Same goes to the poor issue of gays. Yet we do need to be..you know…outside and with others.And do things as A community.But as a part of it. It is annoying in the sense we have to alienate are selves. But most I know, act all well snotty.and act like stuck in A rut.And I don’t like it to alienate are selves as A whole to connect with the breeders.Other gays then.As they say “it isn’t me”.I feel it is B.S.on there part. Soo many gays do need A kick in the ass.To get them out. Seriously getting old being in the closet.But we do need to work with the breeders….all for one..one for all..or fall apart.

By: Quasi

Quasi — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 04:59:48 +0000

Because of the Internet and places like gay.com or manhunt.net, most of the gay bars in Orlando, FL have closed this year, for a lack of clientle. The younger generation are spending less money, looking online and hopefully are less inebriated. The streets may be safer with fewer drunks on the road at 2am, but it diminishes the community a great deal. Now there will be fewer fund raising events, fewer “live and interactive” events where one gets to know people on a more personal basis. I oft imagine Heaven as a place which plays loud booming lively dance music, has flashing lights, big butt-bumping crowds, and a free-flowing drinking fountain of flourescent girly drinks. Give me the days of the 1980’s disco in West Hollywood. Anyone who is GLBT (or has such clientele) and contributes to the right-wing bigots will probably loose their shirt if the Elephants get elected. Good luck Manhunt! I am glad I never knew ye.

By: AllenABQ

AllenABQ — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 04:45:36 +0000

I can certainly attest to this living in a mid-sized city. The Internet is about all there is here. We have three bars, but they aren’t that great. Manhunt here is nothing but a sex/hookup site. The number of local profiles featuring at least one face picture is probably less than 5% versus completely non-face pictures (you know what I mean). Fortunately there are some sites that aren’t quite as brazen as Manhunt. And yet those either don’t have a large number of locals on them, or if they do (like in the case of gay.com chat rooms), they are dominated by the under-25 crowd. I’ve lived here seven years without having more than one or two dates with a handful of locals. Yet the attention I get online is far greater… usually in proportion to how far away they live! Anyway I’m thinking in another few years it’ll be time to find a bigger pond. The search might still be tough, but I need to be somewhere where there are at least SOME real-life social opportunities — not just on-line cruising.