Subscribe to Breaking NewsRuby-Sachs: Can’t Get Divorced in Indiana, Won’t Get Married in Maine?
I’m not so into talking about marriage these days. So much marriage, so little time and now the new numbers out of Maine are looking more and more dismal. In fact, for those readers nervous about the fact that the anti-gay lobby in Maine is outspending the LGBT effort 2 to 1, can link through here to help.
But today, we also learned that an Indiana court has refused to divorce a lesbian couple married in Toronto, living in South Bend. The commissioner, in a cute perversion of logic, signed the divorce papers because he felt that a policy prohibiting gay marriage would support granting gay divorce.
The idea, that one less gay marriage in Indiana is a good thing, was rejected by the courts who rightly pointed out that you have to recognize the marriage to grant the divorce. Too bad really, because fighting for gay marriage through the “back door” of divorce is a smart strategy. This time, the judge didn’t fall for the trick.
All of this is to say that today is a day to do something for gay marriage….or divorce. It’s the same fight and sometimes getting all riled up about love feels counter-intuitive on a gloomy Friday.
So, here’s to divorce rights too.
LOL
If I was married in Toronto (3 July 2004, City Hall), then here’s how bizarre it gets. I know my marriage might be recognized in some states, but it won’t be recognized for Federal purposes in ANY state–unless I’m in the military, in which case I’ll get booted under DADT, or unless I happen to work for a Federal agency in that state which has chosen to extend benefits to gay marrieds. If I’m based in Massachusetts but I work in Ohio, then it’s an internal question of whether I’m really married, but it still won’t show up on an Ohio income tax form. If my husband in Toronto is drunk, staggers in front of the Queen car, and is dead on the streetcar tracks, then I am eligible for his CPP benefits. I do wanna know if it’s possible to get married in Canada, come back to the US, and get married again–remember, Canadian marriage doesn’t confer citizenship through marriage, and US bars any recognition of marriage at Federal level. Does this mean gays get to be bigamists if we want, and do it without our Canuck spouses losing the tax break for being married?
You’ve got to understand that our opponents do not play by the rules. Just read the years and years of court decisions using twisted logic to defeat us everywhere they can. If they recognize divorce for the purpose of wiping out same-sex marriages from other states, that is ALL we will get. Then we’ll be in the position of having 30+ states where an unhappy same-sex spouse can go to dissolve the marriage when things go bad. Will wanting to dissolve a same-sex marriage be looked at as a positive? Will simply being in a same-sex marriage itself be grounds for divorce? Will pro-marriage states have to recognize those divorces? I really don’t want to have to find out.