This Georgia story is wrong on so many levels I don’t even know where to begin. A substitute math teacher is accused of putting a hit on a student (what is the deal with these subs?). Suspect Randolph Forde got into an argument with one of his charges after he asked him if he were gay. Why the math teacher needed to know this is not clear, but I have my theories (and all of them involve something illegal considering how the student is 16).

Anyway Forde and the student get into an argument over the question. The nosey pedagogue (feeling jilted perhaps?) allegedly goes to another student and says there is someone who needs to be no more. He writes the name of the student on a piece of paper and hands it to the high-school version of Brother Mouzone (that reference only makes sense if you watch The Wire). This being high-school though, a place where there are never any secrets, the word spreads and the kid who “caused” all of this mess finds out.

“He says, ‘Ma, you’re not going to believe this but Mr. Forde offered another student money to kill me,’” said the young boy’s mother Marcia Killebrew.

Forde’s lawyer says it was all a big joke and no one’s name was on any piece of paper.

Sure. Okay. I’ll take that, but I still want to know why he needed to know the kid’s sexuality. Wait a minute. Maybe I don’t.