Subscribe to Breaking NewsWithers: Trolls are beautiful people
One of the perks of writing about gay life is the occasional troll who stops by to leave a hot mess. Usually the comment sounds like it was penned by some Westboro Baptist Church crazy or stolen from the personal diary of Utah’s state Senator Chris Buttars.
Most of the time they sound like middle school boys who just learned a homophobic joke that has been in circulation for ages. Special plea to the person who keeps pushing the microwave gay sex ditty: please keep your conflicted feelings about your school’s star quarterback to yourself. There are other places where you can write about your erotic longings.
There are few times though when a troll says something that is so original that attention must be paid. Last week a persona named “Lydia” wrote this:
“In Gods eyes gay marriage will never exist. gay marriage is satan way of weakining America this is why muslim groups fund it.”
Where to begin with these two lyrical sentences. Let’s get the obvious out of the way: this could be a total goof written by a same sex advocate who wants to make the fundies look less than smart. If so, it’s perfect. But let’s assume this “Lydia” really believes this. Gay marriage will never exist? Doesn’t Massachusetts have marriage equality or do the all knowing eyes of God not penetrate the haze of the Bay State?
Then after saying gay marriage does not exist in the eyes of The Man, Ms. Lydia then opines about Satan and Muslims. The unholy trifecta for the Lydias of the world: gays/lesbians, Satan and Muslims (where are immigrants?) Lydia, sweetie. Baby. Dear. Did you think before you you decided to write that line? If you want to jump on the anti gay marriage train please get your game together. Your words don’t help your case.
What I love is anyone who disagrees with you is a troll. Now if you don’t want to be labeled with “ugly” or hurtful names, should you not practice it.
a happy gay troll in new york
Lydia really has one crazy run on sentance.
Someone needs to do an expose about how Muslim groups are covertly funneling money into marriage equality causes.
Thanks Lydia for the best laugh of the day twice.
Tom in Long Beach
James, do any of their arguments against gay marriage have any validity or make any logical sense? Some of their opinions are just more foolish than others.
Ousslander,
Did you read the post? My issue is not with disagreement. There are many a folk who express their disdain about my writing; however, if you come to a gay site with some tired homophobiac joke or some mess about Satan, Muslims, and gay marriage then your troll dues are up to date.
Sincerely,
James
Tiger,
I would say critic like Stanley Kurtz offers logical arguments against gay marriage. I disgaree with him of course, but Kurtz is no “Lydia.”
Sincerely,
James
Isn’t the definition of a troll a man who’s waist size is larger than his pants length?
Or an even better question, if you aren’t gay or lesbian or any other member of the rainbow alphabet, why are you coming to a gay website? Oh. Cause you are gayly repressed? Perhaps we need gay trolls on straight websites encouraging circle jerk prayer services. Just the same when anyone is asking themselves am I gay? If you have to ask, you probably are… if you are coming here, you’ve got gay in your veins. If you are coming here… 365gay is pumping subliminal messages through the screen to make you and your children gay (but only the cute ones).
James, out of curiosity I googled Kurtz and his writings. While he does seem to make rational arguements, he preceeds from false assumptions. In fact, his writing on Sweden and Denmark undermines his arguements by acknowledging the decline of “religiosity”, the increasing influence of the welfare state and other factors contributing to the decline of traditional marriage. He also completely ignores the fact that some gay people also have children. I would love to pick his arguements apart with real logic, but that would require a major essay which I wont inflict on your readers. Thank you tho for bringing Kurtz and his pseudo-science to my attention.
“In Gods eyes gay marriage will never exist. gay marriage is satan way of weakining America this is why muslim groups fund it.”
That is ridiculous and hilarious.
Tiger,
Fair comment about Kurtz and false assumptions. You should check out this book because it spends sometime refuting Kurtz.
http://www.amazon.com/Gay-Marriage-Better-Learned-Evidence/dp/0195187512/ref=sr_11_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1237827818&sr=11-1
Jaqmes, I will check that book out. Thanks again for the info. I do agree that Kurtz is no Lydia. People like Lydia are easy to dismiss because of the stupidity of their statements. Ones like Kurtz are far more dangerous and insidious. His arguements do make sense, as long as you accept his basic premise as fact.
Always amuses me when James and Wayne resort to classsic histrionic and passive-aggressive responses when fact is spoken to fraud. Yes, we all agree you should not be pounded on the head with the bible, even if it addresses actual problems within current society. Realistically, they should be addressing the fraud perpetrated by the liberal bodies of the APA(s) and the ABA based on the musings of the sadomasochistic psychopath, Alfred Kinsey.
It isn’t those cantankerous Muslims funding Satan’s pro gay marriage campaign to destroy our glorious State. In fact, I would blame the Flying Spaghetti Monster or even the whale that ate Jonah. Or could it be those evil gay-atheist-vegetarian-socialists?
Personally, James, I find the implied tone of your anti-Satan rebuke rather insulting — after all, “He” is an American too. Doesn’t he have the right to vote and to express his opinions like everyone else? While I agree that Lydia’s rant was a bit Islamophobic, as well as Satanophobic — still, we should all be grateful for the good news.
Imagine, the tradition minions of evil united and working together in our cause. Now if we can just get Pat Robertson and the Pope to sign on too– what a dynamic duo they would make! Besides, they’re doing the Devil’s anyway for free. So, why not sign them up officially so that they can take credit too for “weakening America“?
Didn’t our brothers in Iran call America “The Great Satan“? Now, with this much anticipated good news about the willingness of militant Islamists to work with Satan — wouldn’t you consider this a wonderful breakthrough in diplomatic relations between the USA (United in Satan America) and elements of the pro-Satan, radical Islamic world? …Oh, happy days!
Incidentally while it is true that most Muslims are peace-loving, non-America-hating, anti-Satanists who express their gentle objections to Same-sex marriage by loping off the heads of their fellow Gay brethren in order to appease “the eyes of God” — this new movement towards Satanic/Radical Islamic Reconciliation is a positive step forward. Just think of the millions of our Gay brothers and sisters in Muslim nations who now have at least the hope held out to them that someday they may be able to attend their own weddings without the fear of losing their heads after the honeymoon.
Lydia’s proposition is just loaded with perks too! Both radical Muslims and our beloved Satan united and working together for the benefit of Gay Marriage. Truly this is a match made in heaven! Wouldn‘t you say? And as for the “muslim groups (who) fund it”…well, my sources tell me that the Prince of Darkness is a little strapped for money this days — with all of his investments in AIG going South — so he could really use the cash.
What could be better than that?
© “Bud” E. Lewis Evans
PS – Have a devilishly nice day!
James, thank you for redefining “troll”. It’s about time someone took the various forms of characteristically gay male prejudice out of it.
Did the “troll” term originally come from the Three Billy Goats Gruff?